Down on the farm

I have work to do; honest work that people will give me EFT coins in exchange for my skills – but I’m not doing it because I'm having trouble fitting a carousel into my circus area.

I used to be paid to do such tasks. I’ve planned the position of carnival rides, tents and food stalls; written their contracts; assessed their risk management plans; and worn unattractive ‘staff’ t-shirts as I watched people enjoy themselves.

So why was I excited that I scored a free merry-go-round on Farmville today? (Thanks Jane for the mystery egg.)

Yes, I’m one of those despised Facebook friends who clog up feed with news that they’ve picked a perfect bunch of morning glory or found a stray pink cow that needs adopting. I am a King of Compost and I don’t care that Farmville doesn’t recognise its female or queen players.

Oh, I resisted at first. I scoffed when I saw intelligent friends wasting their precious time on a lame game. Then a sad looking cow tweaked my need to feed stray animals. I adopted her (thanks Shan) and I’m terrified to calculate how many hours I’ve spent on the farm since.

Oh, I justify it. When I made a Halloween display, I was just warming up my right brain for some creative work and proceeded to make fictional characters discuss their Farmville antics (it will be the last paragraph I cut).

I’ve learnt what sugarcane is meant to look like, that rice takes 12 hours to grow and that eggs sometimes hatch garden gnomes and fun fair rides. This must be good stuff to know that will expand my mind and help me in the future?

Damn it, Farmville is pure addiction and if you’re already there, I’ll be your neighbour and gift you an elephant topiary; if you’re not – run. Run as fast as you can away from the farm. Block it (right click on the FB feed and say be gone false farm), go to your FB settings and ban Farmville, Fishville, Café World, Yoville, Petville and any other villes that offer their gorgeous animated selves to you.

If your children or friends are deciding between taking up smoking or playing Farmville...smoking may be easier to give up and at least they will leave the computer and walk to the shops to buy cancer sticks instead of buying CGI fruit and veg. But if they were fake farmers, perhaps they would be inspired by their bounteous fake produce and want to buy patty pan squash or artichokes...

I’ll be their neighbour.

BTW, my carousel is well placed, but I do have some concerns about its proximity to the tree line, the available public exit in case of fire and that the rabbits running around it may chew on the power cords.